As in, I have nary a creative bone in my body:
I busted my toe in the Great Ice Storm of ’08. My hairdresser tells me a local news station actually had a camera set up right near where I live filming people crawling around on all fours trying to get home. Hilarity! As anyone who watched the episode of House with Mira Sorvino knows, soon my kidneys will fail and a hot engineer will have to drink my pee, bore a hole in my head, and reset my toe-bone.
Just in time for Valentine’s Day!